Thursday, January 13, 2011

Cancer

Isn't it amazing how as a little girl I had no idea what cancer was. I was very blessed that way as many children unfortunately have to deal with cancer every day. It wasn't until my grandma was diagnosed with colon cancer when I was in high school that I really began to understand what cancer is. My grandma won her battle against cancer, but it has been almost two years since my grandpa lost against lung cancer.
Now it seems like cancer is everywhere. At work I have many co-workers who are either dealing with cancer themselves or have loved ones fighting cancer. It is a horrible disease that can affect any part of the body and can hurt so many people.

I remember watching the movie "Twister" and hearing one of the actresses talk about how she has seen a tornado destroy one house and then completely miss the next. It doesn't make any sense. It seems like cancer is the same way, and my question is why does it keep choosing my mom?

Yesterday my mom found out the news again that her cancer has returned. I was with her when the doctor called and I was again amazed at her strength. I watched in hope while she answered the phone but I knew within a few seconds that again the prognosis wasn't good. She asked the doctor many questions. For example, "What are we going to do if the cancer keeps returning this quickly," "What kind of tests are we going to have to run this time," and the last question that killed me to hear, "Is there something that I am doing wrong?"

I knew the answer to that question and I hated that my mom had to ask it. Of course, the doctor assured her that she is doing nothing wrong, and he doesn't know why this keeps happening to her. I know that my mom has done nothing to deserve cancer. She has been the best Christian example to me and has been my role model since I was a little girl. Her life motto is, "Always do the right thing and the polite thing," and by-golly she always has. So why is it that cancer has chosen to invade her life?

As my mom hung up the phone I saw exhaustion in her eyes but it lasted only a second. She knew that she had another battle to face ahead of her and she is only human to first be down about it. After that brief second of weakness my mom simply said, "Well sweetie, we need to start praying again." And just like that my mom was ready for battle.

You hear many different theories about why bad things happen to good people. You hear that God allows bad things to happen so that our faith can be tested. You hear it's the devil trying to bring us down. Some people say it is proof that there is no God.

Mr. G and I were reading in Ecclesiastes last night about how everything is meaningless. It didn't matter what King Solomon did in his life he always realized at the end that it was meaningless. Then he said in Ecclesiastes chapter 3 at the end that the best thing to do is just enjoy your life. No matter what you do, no matter what you go through, if you can enjoy your life then your life will no longer be meaningless.

So you ask why bad things happen to good people? Well, my mom isn't just a good person, she is a great person and again something bad has happened to her. But why her? I know for a fact that many people have been encouraged by my mom through out her many battles with cancer. I have seen people amazed at her strength and her faith. My mom has done exactly what King Solomon said to do because even though she has cancer again she still has a smile on her face. She still enjoys each day and laughs often. She still looks forward to each day and will encourage and uplift others. I know that before my mom had to deal with cancer it didn't mean as much to others to always see her happy because she seemed to have the perfect life anyway. Now they see that despite what the devil throws at her she will be happy because she has God in her life and that is when people's lives are changed.

It is not easy to go through hard times. In fact, it is no fun at all, but it is in those hard times that you can make the biggest difference. I still hate cancer and I hate that it has once again affected my mom and my family. I sometimes still want to ask the question, "Why her," but lucky for me, my mom has already answered that question.

Just last night my mom said to me, "Why not me? Cancer is in the world and always will be. Who am I to say that I am too good to deal with cancer? Who am I to say that I am unwilling to take on this battle for Christ? God loves me just as much as he loves everybody else so why not me?"

All I can say is thank you, God, for a mom who loves You that much!!!

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